Saturday, June 28, 2008

Summer Eases In

The teachers' course went well. It's all over except for the final exam on Monday. This time I made up a lot of Powerpoint presentations and realized how much time it saves in not having to write things out on the board. But in order not to have the slide all plain and vanilla flavored, it takes quite a bit of time to put together a little show that moves and zings.


No plans yet for my break in July. Would really like to travel, but it's currently out of the budget. In lieu of something exotic, perhaps I can get some time by a pool and finish the Bolaño book.


Have seen quite a few movies, some awful - like M. Night Shamylan's The Happening, some okay - like Get Smart, and a really enjoyable one with Audrey Tatou. Been listening to Israeli pop music, and watching Madonna age. Gathering resources for next semester. Getting bored and tired doing very little.


Missing things and people. Some people especially.


It feels the way it feels during the Christmas season, or like a constant string of Sunday nights. Where's this summer I keep hearing about?



Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Chain

What else can go wrong? Or is this the turning point at mid-day?
Woke up a little late and soon discovered there was no water to shave or shower with. Attempting to turn on the "bomb", I learned it was not working.
Called in to the Coordinator to tell her I'd be late and she reminded me there were many last minute things to take care of before my trips this weekend to Tapachula and then to Monterrey, and this being the end of semester, these chores have an urgency to them. I said I'd try to get to work very soon, but knew I'd be somewhat late for having to look for a plumber.
Shaved and washed with a bucket of water directly from the cistern. There were gnat corpses floating in it and the bucket (the only one available) hadn't been used since housepainting, months ago, so it was a distasteful process, and not at all refreshing.
Friend Á drove us around looking for the plumber, and the third stop promised to be successful. Someone would be there in a little while. Á said he'd take me to school, and go back to take the plumber to the house, but first we'd have to stop and get money from an ATM to be able to pay for his services, and Á also needed some gas. Of course, the usually reliable cash machine in the Extra near the gas station was out of order today, so we turned round and headed back to the machine near the other Tec, which had a queue. Last option, head for the plaza and the ATMs beside the bank. At each of these stops he made, I noticed Á dutifully buckled his seatbelt.
Got the money, and back on the road toward school, now quite late.
This time the transit police were diverting traffic and pulling over the odd motorist for... not having seatbelts on, and wouldn't you know, the one time someone had forgotten to buckle up... Á got a summons for $200 (but actually for not carrying his papers which the transit guy asked for after stopping him for the seatbelt oversight).
Á laughed as if he couldn't care less, but there was an edge of something else in his laugh. He dropped me off at school and said he'd go back and take care of the plumber, who, he told me later, got angry for having to wait too long and left. Á hunted down another guy who said he'd come to the house.
Meanwhile, after arriving late and in a grouchy mood, something I said chased away a student who needed to take his final exam. The system would not accept changes necessary to a student's record in order to prevent her from missing her graduation. I couldn't locate a chart necessary to evaluate the final averages of a certain group, nor could I find the student whom I had sent running. I also had to make the arrangements about the trip. Should it be a zig-zag thing between the two destinations, or could some of the zag be cut out? I was advised I'd be flying up to my course directly after administering the exam rather than returning and flying out from here.
At about 3:30, I had resolved several of the items on my agenda, though the touchy system still required one and only one particular signature to authorize the change for the graduating student.
I called Á, who told me a plumber had fixed the bomb for a nominal charge and water was running again. However, while we were speaking, he told me water was running down the stairs. He'd overcompensated to fill the empty tank on the roof and had left the bomb running a little too long. The water overflowed and came out through the television cable vent, flooding the upstairs hallway.
I finished my cigarette (during the standard "Character's Reflective Delay") and returned to my office to get Rodrigo's signature. Servicios escolares says they will handle the rest of the changes.
So let's see... $350 for the plumber, $200 for the traffic summons, and water damage in the house. Although the school is paying a fortune for the trip, I am sure I'll be spending additional money there, but I think, with fingers crossed that the day from hell is drawing to a close. Would love to relax and do nothing this evening, but have to plan out the material for the teachers' summer Intermediate English course.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Closer

Well, today was the last day of semester 13. Grades are in. Time to start thinking about the summer session.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

The Open Window

The boy lay bathed in sweat on his bed, awake. Water covered every inch of his body, and as he lay there in only his briefs there was nothing to absorb the flood of perspiration. His hair was matted and soaked. The sheet was sticking to his back every time he moved.
His eyes were red and swollen. In desperate need of sleep, he closed them a few times and tried to rest, but he was too uncomfortable. Something was making his brain itch. Something would not let him sleep.
He was alone in the apartment, but he had been alone many times before. Nothing so simple as being by himself should irritate him. It shouldn't. He tried to think of something else.

People were passing in the street below and adding to the din of Harbor Avenue. It was late, but quite a few were out and about, but as he heard them milling below, it reminded him of his being alone and he had to turn to something else. He picked up a paperback book and began reading a dog-earred page, but soon he remembered it was a murder mystery. That would never do. He tossed it on the bureau.

God! He was sweating buckets! He knew he should open a window or two, but it was his wont to keep every one closed and locked. The doors were locked also. He dabbed at his neck and face with a damp handkerchief. It didn't do much good so he took a clean one from one of the drawers in the bureau. Hundred and thirty-nine dollars that bureau had cost on a Labor Day sale. It looked like crap. He was sweating and the wood felt sticky.

Still searching for something to do, he picked up a comic magazine. It was light-hearted enough, but when he finished with it, he realized there were no more lying around.
He lay down again on the sweat-soaked sheet and closed his eyes, but it was useless. He could not sleep. Something would not let him. He did not, as a rule, suffer from insomnia, and could find no rationale for this perverse sleeplessness. He could say it was too hot and there was little air circulating in the room, but he had fallen asleep under these conditions many times before. He could say he was overtired, and the room was not dark enough, and there was the din in the street, but these things also he had hitherto conquered.
He sat up again and turned on the radio on the night table. Out came a song he had heard many, many times before. Listlessly, he lay there and let the words drone through his head:
Ahm gonna give ya mah love, girl,
Gonna let it fly in through yer window.
Ahm gonna make love to you...

Suddenly, it came to him. He had certainly locked the doors as soon as his folks went out, front door and back, and shut the windows, but he was not quite sure about the window in the kitchen, at the other end of the apartment. True, he could not feel any breeze blowing through the apartment, but it did not settle his mind. He was afraid to leave his room to check on it, but he knew he would not be able to fall asleep until he did. Well, then, he thought, he would just stay awake until the folks came home. When Mama and Frank got in they would open most of the windows, but that would be all right because the three of them would all be there in case anyone ever tried to break in or something.
No! He couldn't stay awake until that late. Besides, they might be tipsy. He should be asleep when they came in.
Why should he be so paranoid about an open window? That was silly, right? To prove to himself how silly he was being torturing himself in this dreadful heat, he opened his bedroom window a few inches, opened it a crack as Frank would sometimes say.
He could hear noises from the pier and sounds of people below on Harbor Avenue more clearly.

Then he thought, sure, this is fine. There's nothing outside this window but the street. There was a fire escape leading up to the one in the kitchen, and it came up from a dark back yard.
He must get up and close it or he would never fall asleep. He was afraid. Afraid enough to feel a chill, a chill which, even in this heat, was not welcome. All he had to do was go out and close it quickly, twist the lock and go back to bed. That was all. Then he could even open his bedroom window all the way. That was safe enough. There was no fire escape out there.

Slowly, he crept through his doorway to the sitting room, and from there, slowly, ever so slowly, through three more rooms to the doorway of the kitchen.
He stood there looking across the room at the window. It was wide open. The short cafe curtains were fluttering in the slight breeze, which he could now feel hitting his bare chest, making the short hairs of puberty stand on end. He felt a sickening sensation inside that adolescent chest.

Breath held fast, he strode across the room and stood before the window, ramshackle window, cheap curtains, slightly soiled and billowing carelessly.
Why had he felt so frightened? God! He felt like such a wimp!
Oh, well, might as well get it over with. It was best to play it safe anyway. He was not afraid anymore, but he thought, with a fire escape outside, this one window should be kept closed, and yes, maybe locked also.

He reached up, put both hands on the window to bring it down, and then it happened. A man stepped out of the darkness where he had been standing and stared open-eyed into the boy's face.
Slowly, the boy's fingers lost all their feeling and his legs wouldn't hold him up. His vision blackened and he fainted dead away, crumpling in a heap on the floor in front of the window.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Blackboard Updated

Well, it seems our platform is going to be updated before the next semester begins. We received an announcement that we're moving up to Version 7.3. We're only a little behind. In researching, I see the app is up to Version 8, which looks quite different from what we're using currently. I really enjoy working with BB because you only have to take care of things once and then the system grades and maintains the work so it can be reused each semester, but of course students find things to complain about.


The brightest always seem to be able to log in, do their assignments, and log out without any issues, while the (for lack of a softer description) slackers always have problems. "I couldn't finish the quiz. The system locked me out." "I finished the quiz, but I didn't get the correct grade!" And we don't even make use of adaptive release. If there were criteria to be met before being able to proceed, it would probably cause more problems than the teachers have time to handle.


MacMillan's English Campus (MEC) was not popular with the students, even though the exercises were relatively easy. I think because it worked too well at what it was supposed to do. I love all my students (when I run into them at the mall, that is.), but very few show innovation or enthusiasm, and most just go through the motions. Was I like that at their age? It was so long ago, I don't remember.


To give an idea of how long ago that was - I remember one semester, early in the term, when our English teacher predicted that a song just beginning to get airplay on the radio (remember when the major source of music was the radio?) would be a big hit before the term's end. The song she was referring to was "Light My Fire" by The Doors!!!


Anyway, it's a new era. Now we work online so much. Back then, there wasn't even a line to be on. And so, Blackboard is being updated. I'm looking forward to the changes, but not the excuses. By the way, I've been listening to a lot of indy music, and I predict...oh, nevermind, I never get this right.



What's Happening at The Office?

The latest episode just wasn't funny. Everyone except Pam and Jim showed their mean side. Ryan was the worst. He's become so nasty since his promotion. I suppose later the writers will try to convince us that his coke problem brought out his nastier nature, but after seeing everyone scratching at the walls like that, who cares?.

Discussing this with a friend, we came to the conclusion that this fourth season should be scratched when the show goes into syndication, except for maybe the dinner party episode which was pretty funny.

Having seen all of the British version, most of which made me cringe, I thought the Americans had made the comedy way more palatable. Now, I'm not so sure.

Anyway, I'll keep watching for a while, and hope things come around to where they were, character-wise.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Some Interesting Sites Noted

Check out what Emily Jo Cureton has done by illustrating some of the words she finds each day in the crossword puzzle in the New York Times. New York Times Crossword Drawings. Her work and that of many more illustrators is featured on Drawn! The Illustration and Cartooning Blog.


Watch some Brickfilms. Not sure what they are? They're video clips made with Lego (usually parodies of cinema films). You can find loads of them on YouTube or you can search the source at Brickfilms.com.


For insightful reviews of new (and some older) movies visit Cinematronics by Álvaro. His reviews are en español. I find myself agreeing with his viewpoint more times than not.


To hear the latest indy music being made (also accompanied by insightful reviews) visit Ryan's Smashing Life.


Lifehacker presents hundreds of tips and tricks for you to try out on your computer, and they offer many helpful hints on how to give new life to things around the house that you might have been thinking of throwing away. You can also find Free Download of the Day here, wherein you get to try out software, sometimes fully functioning versions that are given away on a time-limited basis. You have to act quick or lose opportunities.


BigThink is an ambitious online project that brings together the views of experts from a range of different fields across the world and enables users the opportunity to interact and make their own contributions with an easy-to-use and accessible interface.


I have all of these sites on an RSS feed so I am constantly made aware of updates. My aggregator is Bloglines. You should check it out and sign up for free. There's nothing to download, but whenever you sign on, you can find all your favorite blogs and news in one place. I used to waste hours surfing all over the 'Net for interesting information. Now I just spend a couple of hours poring over my growing list of favorite sites.



Click to scribble

skrbl now

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

If the devil only knew...

April 23rd, 2008


Rating:



Before the Devil Knows You're Dead


This was a finely made, riveting movie. Some reviewers in the NY Times Readers' Reviews say the scene on the porch between father and son didn't add much, or has been done better before, but for this viewer it was a gratifying explication for the motives which began the terrible events here related. This was the kind of thing missing from such highly rated (and Oscar-rewarded) stories as There Will Be Blood and No Country For Old Men. When those films were over I did leave the theater wondering why such pathological characters were the focus of our current crop of "great story-telling movies." Unexplained motivation leaves me cold.
In Before the Devil... Lumet has not missed a beat. Everything we need to know to be involved in these characters' tales is included. Sterling performances by all in an excellent display of cinematography, from Amy Ryan's few scenes up through the histrionics of Hoffman and Finney. Pooh to anyone who finds fault in this film, and Coen brothers, take a lesson in how to involve your audience in caring about dysfunctional characters. It's not enough to just be quirky and photograph it beautifully. It helps a lot to include even a small scene supplying motivation.


- michaelbrown7



Saturday, April 19, 2008

The Last Lesson

Dear Haojun:

Thanks for your nice letter. I can tell from your tone China is very excited about the return of Macao. I hope the transfer is as smooth as that of Hong Kong. You seem all caught up in the festivities and they seem less worrisome than the Y2K business and millennium madness we are experiencing over here. I wonder how you are doing vis-à-vis computer problems. We have not exchanged e-mail in quite some time.

It has been a long time since we last communicated. I know you have been very busy redecorating your new home. It must be coming along beautifully. Perhaps you can send me a photo.

Let me tell you why I have not written. Just as you are trying to improve your English, I have been trying to better my writing abilities in my native language. As I told you before mostly I write fiction. There is much need for improvement if I wish to capture a readership. I wish I had the abilities of our mutual favorite Lu Xun, but that is another story.

I signed up for a six-week online writing course and have made many new friends. Each lesson required us to approach the craft of fiction writing from a specific perspective. One week we had to pretend to be one of our characters so as to introduce ourselves to each other. I found it difficult trying to discover my own personality as if looking at myself from the outside. Another time we had to focus on point of view and how to use it to tell a story. For that one, I wrote the assignment three times before I settled on telling it in the second person. I wrote, "You say..." and "You go..." as if I were telling the character what to do. It was critiqued positively so I guess the rewrites paid off. And once, we had to interview one of the characters we'd created as if he or she were applying for a job in our stories. That piece took me a while before I settled on a magazine type interview wherein I pretended the reporter wanted to speak to "the man on the street" rather than a celebrity.

Each week I struggled along slowly and painstakingly trying to get better at the craft. However, this last lesson I found most difficult of all. It was concerned with conflict, complications and plot. How to build to a crisis and then resolve it. And I was at a loss. My conflict was I could not come up with a plot I liked well enough to post and perhaps develop later as I go into further courses.

My friend John suggested I use the tension filled story I wrote about the boy and the unlocked window, but I had written it so long ago, I found it sophomoric. I really felt uncomfortable using any of my very early writing.

Then he advised me to use two characters who have been floating around in my head for a long time without a story, but as I explained to him, they don’t have a story yet. They are just colorful characters without conflicts of their own. I need to think up some interesting situations to place them in, but for this exercise I was drawing a blank.

I thought of writing to you to ask for help with something that would seem exotic to my friends over here, but there wasn’t enough time and besides, many of the online students are not from America, so if I wrote of something I was unsure of I would just look foolish.

What to do? What to do? Time was running out.

I came up with a plan, which I am not proud to tell you. I cobbled together an unbelievable labyrinthine plot from a book I purchased a very long time ago. It wasn’t much help back then and I should have known better than to try to make it work for me now, but I was desperate to end this course with a completed assignment. I used the book’s suggestion to string together little bits of action that were supposed to coalesce into a complicated tale of vengeance. What I wound up with was a tepid second rate murder mystery and it was so badly put together and underdeveloped, it read more like a summary than a story. As the final day approached and no other ideas were forthcoming, I threw up my hands in exasperation and went ahead and posted my work.

I regretted my action immediately.

As was to be expected, it was met with a lukewarm reception. We critique each other’s work and a few of my fellow students said some kind things, but most, including my mentor, made it clear they did not think it was my best work. They were right.

I was ashamed. It’s only a writing course, you might say, and there is always tomorrow to do better. It’s true, but my pride would not allow me to let this hodgepodge represent me in my final assignment of my freshman course. I was not being true to myself, and so, I deleted it from the postings. Now, I had nothing to represent me.

What to do?

I went out to take a walk to clear my thoughts and saw all the signs of the coming millennium celebration. I also saw a dead pigeon in the street. It made me heartsick to think of how many hours flying the poor useless creature had put in to arrive nowhere, and here it was, a pile of crumpled feathers someone had brushed off the sidewalk into the street.

When I returned to my apartment building, your letter was waiting for me and it made me feel so much better. Every time we communicate, I realize how big this world is and how insignificant some of my “problems” are.

I read your letter and like a flash, I came up with an idea and must run now to re-post my final assignment. I realize where the conflict is and how it could be resolved. I must thank you for writing and unknowingly helping me to see what was under my nose all the time.

Thank you very much for the stamps and the magazine clippings.

Please extend my greetings to your mother and the rest of your family.

I will write to you again soon now that this course is finishing up and I will have some free time.

Your friend,

Michael

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Eight Years

It feels like yesterday. Still in my heart. Still in my head.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

The What-If Factor

Ineradicable cobwebs fill the corners of my life.
The ghosts of things that might have been haunt me though they haven't.

In my dream, we said some terrible things -
No, I take that back,
I said some awful things to you -
Hate-filled words, untake-backable words,
And left you in confusion
Wondering what you'd done.

Then I walked through fire -
Returning to a past which had not, could not happen.

I took the consolation you deserved for myself,
In the arms of someone who no longer was there.
After thinking how good it felt, I realized it could not last.
It was a chimera.

I saw clearly I'd given away the present for a past I could not reclaim
And thus, my future was obliterated.

When you woke me and you were still real,
For a brief moment there was relief,
But then I noticed cobwebs
Constructed of motes of sadness
And felt the heat of the coming fire.

Somewhere in this there's a formula for figuring probability.
Somewhere there's a path to get to the average mean.
There's the murk of the future and the bottleneck of the recent past
And glorious worlds at either end,
But I'm stuck in between.

Friday, March 14, 2008

Sally Graham

Five years ago I was intimidated by Sally Graham. Well, I respected her superior intellect. She was almost ready to retire then. I think she told me she was fifty-eight. She's a psychiatrist and a member of the American Philatelic Society and at that time I think her stamp collection numbered in the 60,000s.
The way I met her was I was talking to the doorman and I mentioned I was just renewing my interest in stamp collecting, something I had done when I was a kid. And he told me there was someone in the building who was also a collector and if I wanted he would give her my apartment number. I told him go ahead, why not, I wanted to meet other people who were into it. That evening, she rang my bell. I invited her in and we talked for an hour or so.
She sat on my dining room floor explaining things to me like how I could always tell stamps that belonged to republics of the Soviet Union because they had letters on them in the Cyrillic alphabet that looked like CCCP and NOYTA and how stamps from Taiwan differed from those from mainland China because those from the Peoples Republic had an ideogram resembling a wishbone, and it was the symbol that stood for man. It was pronounced ren, but I only had to concern myself with that on the earlier issues because the later stamps now said China in the English alphabet and the sets were numbered. She was a free spirit and her hair was unkempt and she reminded of nothing so much as a wilted flower child, but she sounded very intelligent.
She told me I should join the APS and I would get circuits on approval. It was a good way to fill up my collection cheaply and it was a very secure procedure.
The difference in our ages precluded becoming very friendly but every once in a while I would see her in the lobby on my way out to work or coming home and I remember when she told me she had officially retired. She was looking forward to more time at home and not having to see patients. They all had so many problems. She said at times she felt like she might bug out.
About a year ago I had a problem with the APS. Someone from the Society called me and told me the next person on the Peoples Republic of China circuit did not receive the booklets I had looked at and sent on. He was a Chinese with a post office box for an address and I had my suspicions. The stamps were valuable. I called Sally and asked her advice, because whenever I received a circuit from PRC she was always the prior recipient and this particular time I had foolishly forgotten to save the priority mail insurance receipt.
She told me in her soft-spoken solicitous way, "It's a test. To teach you to follow the instructions. Why don't you call the APS and tell them the number and maybe they can track it down without the actual receipt?"
"And if they can't?" I asked.
"Well," she said, "It couldn't cost you more than a hundred dollars. That's all it was insured for."
I felt like one of her patients. It was not what I wanted to hear.
I was able to clear my responsibility with the APS with a phone call, but after that I asked them not to send me anymore stamps from China. My collection was pretty full and I didn't want to be responsible for something that expensive again.
As I say, that was a year ago.
This afternoon, in the crisp December weather, I went downstairs to buy some lunch in the new Garden of Eden gourmet food shop that recently opened in our building's ground floor. It is filled with the delicious aromas of all kinds of exotic foods, fruits and baked items, meats and poultry, cooked and ready to go. I bought some three potato salad and some roast beef and when I entered the lobby I ran into Sally Graham. I was a little taken back by how she looked. Her teeth were all discolored and her hair was still unkempt but now it was completely gray. It looked dirty and she had put on quite a bit of weight. She was wearing an ill fitting down jacket with food stains on it.
"You cost me five dollars," she said, and it really sounded like an accusation.
"How's that?" I asked. I really didn't want to stand there and talk. I wanted to come upstairs and have my roast beef.
She went on to explain since I wasn't on the Chinese circuit anymore, she had to walk all the way over to Fourth Avenue to the Post Office to insure her package and send it on to the next person on the list instead of leaving it with the doorman for me.
I asked her how many stamps she had now and she told me she had stopped counting when she went over 100,000.
"How do you catalog them all?" I asked.
"Well, I haven't gotten around to doing that," she said. "They're all in shoeboxes. Some of my friends who are dealers tell me I should, especially if I want to sell them, and I may have to soon. I'm running out of money."
I was surprised and said, "Oh?"
"Yes," she said, "I just paid October's rent."
That really surprised me. It was not the kind of thing I expected from her.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Views

Two people carry one thing and an argument ensues,
It ends with the big thing left on the street when one of them blows a fuse.
A patient sues his doctor and the lawyer sports new shoes,
The doctor makes excuses, saying, "I'm always the one they accuse!"
Fans at the game are anxious to see the visitors lose,
Though the leading player rolls on the ground and rubs a swelling bruise.
Mom and Dad watch a crime in progress on the local news;
A hateful man in an interview hurts with the words he spews.
Three competing suitors are hoping the beauty will choose
Against a backdrop of music and hearts of pink in varying hues.
The tenants default on their rent with excuses by ones and by twos,
And complain of the neighbor who stinks up the hall with the garbage that he strews.
Robert propounds on Kate's erroneous definition of clerihews;
In order to get her to see the light, he gives her a book to peruse.
The church falls short on worshippers who can't sit in predestined pews,
And Masons turn out their membership for failing to pay their dues.
A husband abandons his wife in aborted attempts to amuse;
Her demeanor is drowned in pot luck casseroles, soups and stews.
A detective sifts through the ashes searching remains for clues;
He's found an earring, a tooth and a nail, but he doesn't know whose.
Teenagers wooing, say they aren't smoking. They are. It's only a ruse.
They're thinking of eloping because her father is turning the screws.
Workers waiting for jobs are standing outside in queues,
While the hardnosed factory owner seeks alternatives to use.
Someone is at the zoo with a child his girlfriend won't let him abuse,
And an old man who's lost a fortune regains it by singing the Blues.

Check out student writing at TEC Inglés.